Nordic Pariah
by Duggs
Summary: Darkness. This has been the whole world to one certain girl. One. Her personal hell has been her whole life, yet she doesn't know it. She has always known only one home. One. Little did she know, one person will change her own personal hell. One. Adventure, not in her entire life had she ever thought of that one word. One. One way to turn. Tick Tock. Light.
1. The Word I Have Never Known

**Warning: This does contain a very controversial issue, child abuse. If you are uncomfortable with this matter, then don't read further. If you are comfortable, than by all means read on. **

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Chapter 1

I only get to come out of the darkness of the Closet once a month. Mother says this is for keeping up appearances. I didn't get a full reason why because she struck my face with the back of her hand. My face was still numb and blossomed pink, although I've gotten used to this over the years of my life and the pain started to feel like nothing. Unless I get into trouble, then the punishments hurt.

My body was adorned in fine clothes, which were a dull green, frilly, and a small white animal was stitched to the neck hem, making the back of my neck feel itchy. I lifted my arm up to scratch it but Father quickly saw this, he forcefully yanked my arm down. A tall brown-skinned man gave him a weird look and Father gave him a stunning smile, "She has a rash on her neck." He pointed to his own neck to symbolize my own, "I don't want it to worsen." The dark-skinned man nodded in approval, and went back to walking along the Merchant Quarters of Windhelm.

Mother, Father and I were walking slowly around the stalls. A variety of foods were displayed in one. One looked delicious to me; it had a smooth green surface that looked vaguely like a bosom, with a brown stem reaching out of the top. But when I saw the sharp faced woman manning it, I turned my face away from it. Mother taught me to never go near anyone, because I am an affliction upon this world. It's strange though, the whole family greets me with punches or kisses with their palms and _they _never get sick.

Soft whispers carried through the market, such as: "Oblivion Spawn." "Bitch." "Skeever Sewer." "Bird Shit." And, "Freak." There's that word again, _freak_. This is the word that I am called all the time at home; it's my name. Although I know better not to answer to the whispers that call my name, I'm too scared to.

I try as hard as I can to not look around me, I normally can't let curiosity take over me. I've learned it's a sign of weakness. But my body takes over to me and I look to me right. Seeing a short woman with short, curly red hair and green eyes. Her hand was in the oddest of places.

In a little boy's hand.

Beside them both was a slightly shorter man with a scruffy brown beard, and the worst thing happened. He met my gaze. Warmth enters my cheeks. I'm…

What am I doing? I don't know what to call it. But I know what I'm feeling. Embarrassment, this something I feel all the time. Like when I get tripped by my uncle, James, and he hits me hard on the back. He hits the worst.

All he does as make a sound of disgust, and the red-haired lady who was oddly holding the little brow-haired boy's hand, glared at him. All I could make out was, "Don't do that." She threw her arms up and mumbled something, but her voice grew in strength. "-how would you like your son to be treated like that." She turned away from him, and knelt down to the boy. She did the strangest things I've ever seen in my life in my life.

She said. "I love you my child."

_Love._

My heart lifted at the word, it made me feel giddy in some way. I hardly ever feel _giddy._ I started wondering how it would roll of my tongue. _Love…_

The woman smiled at the boy-her son- and he smiled back. None one has ever smiled at me before. Then she placed her hands in her son's armpits. I thought she was going to throw him, or maybe slam him to the ground.

She didn't.

Instead she lifted him up to her shoulders, he gave out a sound that I have only ever heard when Mother and Father went into their room at night. One that can vibrate even the Closet.

Laughter.

The red-haired woman's son was laughing, and she was to.

He grinned. "I love you to!"

Is this _love_? When a person treats them nicely, when they play with them and tell them they…_ love_ the other.

_Love is odd._

I didn't realize I was gawking so long at them until the jerk of a hand on my chin sent me spiraling. Tripping on my own two feet and falling on my bottom. It hurt, but I've had worse pain. Still, I couldn't help think everyone else would judge me more. Before I knew it, the warm cheeks and the ugly feeling came back.

Embarrassment washed all through my mind.

My chest started heaving. Why am I feeling like this? My ears caught a few snickers across the market, and my eyes saw the woman standing over me. The red-haired woman was offering me her hand

"Do you need a hand?" her voice was quite, and her hand extended at me.

I just stared at her, speechless nonetheless. My mouth quivered with shock.

_Help?_ No one has ever helped me to get up before.

Does she _love_ me? No, that couldn't possibly be it, I'm not her child. Then why would she be nice to me?

I did something I shouldn't have ever done.

I said (more like stammered). "I-I c-can't, you...you-you'll get...get sick."

Her eyes widened. "How, do you have Rock-bite?" Why does she so concern for me? Mother would have had me thrown into the Closet by now, with a few hard spanks.

It suddenly seemed easier to talk to her for some reason, my words flowed easier. "No. My mother told me that I'm the disease of the w- world."

I shouldn't have said that.

The same brush of brown velvet flew by me. Mother, "Excuse me Hilde." Mother sighed sweetly; she must know her in some way. But this "Hilde" had never been in the house before. But, how should I know? I've only ever been to the Kitchen and Closet.

The red-haired woman gently, not forcefully, grabbed my hand. My mind forgot that I'm an "affliction" to the world and didn't fight back, I let her _help_ me. My hairs on my neck stood on end, making my neck feel itchy from the animal fur again. I got to my feet, wanting to itch my neck but remembering what Father or Mother would do.

I realized, Mother never offered to help me up.

"I could have helped her myself." Mother looked at me, with a smile. But her eyes were…something else. It wasn't the same as the way the woman named Hilde looked at her son, or looked at me when she helped me up.

"Oh, nonsense, I was glad to." Hilde giggled. "The child seemed so frightened, such a scared-cat your daughter." Hilde smiled at me, and I had the sudden urge to hug her, and tell me it'll be alright. Something Mother never did for me.

"Yes, my daughter was certainly frightened." Father approached us, greeting Hilde with a hello and looking at me with the same look Mother gave me. I noticed he didn't say "Freak." That is my name… maybe he's just trying to be formal.

"Mama, look what I found!' The tiny voice came from the boy Hilde played with.

"What is it sweetie-pea?" She brushed the boy's shaggy brown hair and he jumped with glee. What he held in his hand was the same green bosom-shaped food I was staring at earlier.

"Apple mommy, it's an apple!" He cheered with delight.

I felt a wave of emotion grow inside me, jealousy. I wanted it, I saw it first. It was _mine_.

The mood was soon drained after I heard that word, _apple_. It's so strange, so many new words.

"Yes, yes, go to daddy and tell him to by a dozen." Hilde was so gentle with him. Mother would have had me return it.

"Okay!" the boy smiled and ran off to the scruffy man who must be his father.

"Sorry, but we must take our leave." Mother grinned.

A strong force gripped my arm. "Come**, **_now_." Father whispered in my ear. A sudden pang of fear went through me. I've never been scared of a beating before. Well, not anymore. They just happen. Hilde gave a warm, "Goodbye!" while I followed Mother and Father up the stone steps to the Noble Quarter's. Our house, compared to other houses, was massive. It was made of porcelain stone, the three floors of the house was towering compared to the one floored ones. It was out of place in Windhelm.

When the doors to our house closed, I closed my eyes, ready for the-

The singing pain whipped at me temple. "Open your damn eyes Freak." I did, following my Mother's voice I opened my eyes. Revealing their eyes full of…something…

Again, this wasn't like Hilde looking at her child. It was full of something else, anger.

"Kneel down." It was Mother's voice. I did as she commended.

Their hands ripped at my clothes, shredding it from my body, leaving my naked body stumbling. I felt the strip of black fabric across my eyes, so tight I couldn't shut them. Tears are already trying to cleanse my too dry eyeballs, but they completed to no avail.

"We heard what you told her." It was both of them in unison, their voices like a cheese grater against one of those black-boards I've seen in The Kitchen.

I knew not to tell the woman Hilde that, but for some strange reason, I felt obligated to, she greeted me with a smile. I don't know I just, did. All I did was try to find Mother's face through the black linen, but all saw was eternal darkness, and was greeted with a silent gouge to my back. One of them had gotten the whip; they hadn't used that ever since I broke the yellowish vase in the Family Room. I was never aloud there again.

Crackle after smack after crackle came the whip on my back. I could hear the skin leap to the floor each time I winced, and the slight feeling of a warm trickle of a liquid seeping from my body.

Over the years the family had referred to this as blood.

Then my mind wandered, away from the whip clashing against my body, away from the water trying to clean my eyes.

To the woman who held her boy up in the air. Who smiled at him, while he smiled back, Mother never did this or anyone for that matter. All they did was hit and hit after hit.

Nothing.

No one did this to me. I soon wondered after that, but it made my head hurt and that wasn't going well with the lashings upon the small of my back.

Soon after that the pain lessened, and then the pain stopped completely.

"Get her out." Father's voice sent shivers up my spine. What? I'm not going to The Closet? I've always gone to it once my punishments have been done.

The black linen that held my eyes open was torn away from me, the water fell from my tear-ducts to my cheeks. Urging hands grasped my weak body, dragging me against the gray-stoned floor. Light sung my head as the door opened to the snow covered Noble Quarter.

They continued to drag me outside, looking around to make sure no one was watching.

Keeping up appearances.

They hauled me around Windhelm, avoiding the wandering eye and maneuvering the people in heavy cloaks holding big knives and wooden plates. Until we reached a darkened area, where doors were all over the place and cloth hanged from lines, where stairs made this place look like a hillside.

The snow prodded my face with mind-shattering speckles of frost. Over the times I've been out of The Closet, my mind has come to a conclusion. I hate snow. It is cold on my skin, it gets everywhere around you and every time I ever get it on my fine clothes, I get punished.

That was the first time I ever thought about hating my punishments.

My feet were at the edge of the steps, Mother and Father's nails made my shoulders bleed, and my naked body's heat fought back at the tear freezing wind. I felt my body swing back and forth and my eye sight seemed hazy.

Nobody was present before be.

Nobody, no one could witness what-

That's when my body flung forwards. Down the stairs, into my personal oblivion.


	2. The Phrase That Will Overcome Me

**Good morning or afternoon people of the world! I'm so glad that your reading this. **

**Jeez, I'm a lot more ****enthusiastic then I was in the last chapter! "Child abuse!" was basically what I warned you guys about last chapter.**

**This time, it is more story related. So, if you got through the beatings of last chapter, good job! I'm so very proud of you! Although, seriously, child abuse is a very terrifying matter, I'm just trying to make light of things!**

**Thank you, and read on!**

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Chapter 2

Blue skin.

This is what I saw when my eyes fluttered open to not meet the harsh snow-lit sky, but natural lamp light hanging above me. The one with the blue skin had a linear, chiseled face. These eyes were a pure muddle, and puffy lips the color of the sky, it's was the color of midnight that fell like stars across his face. This was a male.

His eyes blinked in peculiar surprise, "Thank Azura, you're awake." His voice was deep, almost monotone. Under me I felt a certain relaxation I've never felt before. My eyes rolled around the room, I could see a wooden type thing. It's a dresser, yes; I've seen this type of material in The Kitchen before. My eyes also saw-

They only saw his face, only his face, why am I so transfixed on him?

"Here," he held in front of me a marred tin cup in his cerulean hands. "You'll need it." A slight smile was now written across his face, and all I did was stare at it. He was _helping _me, like when the woman Hilde gave her hand out to me so I could stand. It all burst through my mind like clattering jewels falling across a marble floor.

The sudden shot of fear went through me, "W-here, w-here am I?" I managed to mutter, only to be thrown back by his honey-sweet smile.

"Please, you don't have to worry, your safe-"

Mother and Father are here, I'm sure. This is all just some trick, or maybe I'm dreaming. Even if it was, I still couldn't help the nagging feeling that told me to get out. I raised my body but the knife-skewering pain ricocheted throughout my mind, head, and body. My scream didn't even escape my body; all I did was fall into a blanket of cold darkness again.

_More cries of pure terror, yet they were not my own. They were another's; I was suddenly in a hazy green meadow in "who knows where". The other's scream was scurrying across a meadow, stumbling upon its feet and blasting purple orbs from its hands. My eyes scrunched to notice that this one was a female. She had long blonde hair with pink flowers dancing in it, her stern eyes a tree-leaf green, her soft lips decayed by dirt. When each of her purple orbs touched the ground, out came a giant of ice. Its arms like spears of frost, and triangular head reaching for the skies above. The female kept running across the night-shaded field of grass as the roar came to my ears. My hands muffled the shriek that made my blood pound._

_There came the thing I've never before dreamed of in my life, a giant lizard._

_It came crashing from the lavender skies onto the now shaking earth. It's mighty burst of laughter sent my body shivering in fear._

"_Run, my little one. Yes…_

_Run, give in before your fate and be spared."_

_But the female didn't any attention to the giant lizard; all she did was let her monsters come slashing at it, in which they were blasted with an infinite amount of fire._

_Fire, it somehow gave me… I don't know._

_Rejuvenation, yes, that's the word._

_I found myself on the dew meadow, walking towards the flames. I paid no attention to the girl any more, nor her frost giants. All I wanted- needed- to do was for the spurts of fire to envelop my body its mocking embrace. That is exactly what happened._

The cold cloth was wrapped around my head as soon as I felt the flames magical wonder; I needed the flames once more. I desired them. But then I saw _his _face again, beside the bed, looking directly into my eyes, and mine his. I felt a new kind of warmth, not the kind like I felt in the market when I had fell down. Instead this warmth flooded my cheeks, it made me feel. Something…

"You past out for some time," that same smile came to his face, it made me want to smile to. I have never smiled. "I gave you a cold dish-cloth because you were burning up." He got up from the bedside, and out the room I was in. I wanted to say something like, "Don't' go."

Why am I feeling like this? This is stupid, foolish, and everything I hate. I should be afraid, I needed to get out. When I had convinced myself of acting dumb for feeling whatever that was, I tried to get up, and no pain came to my body. I was completely healed, what had happened? I'm pretty sure falling down a flight of stone steps would at least give bruises, at the Kitchen, I was pushed down stairs a lot, and they hurt.

When I got out of the bed, the sheets slipped off. I was then completely naked, like was before. I'm always naked when I'm at home, but for some reason. I was embarrassed to even walk like this, so I grabbed the blanket that covered the bed and curled it around me.

I wanted to go home, I felt safe there. Home is where I belong, even if Mother or Father or anybody there had never lifted me up and said verbally the _word_. Could I blame them for not ever hugging me, but instead with kicks and whips? I after all was an affliction in this world; they told me if I ever touched another person. They'd turn a pure white and die.

I am pure white. My hair reaches to my waist in silvery-white colors. My eyes are a sharp pink, and my lips thin but a crispy pearly color. I was born like this, and not one other person has my features, so I've earned the name "Freak". Right?

Right?

When I reached the door, it opened to reveal _his_ face peering in. I hated him, he made me feel foolish and only confirmed that I am not normal. Nobody ever feels like that.

Love is foolish; Mother didn't ever tell me she loved me because it's stupid. Hilde is wrong.

That is not normal.

My mind and body decided to make a run for it. Our shoulders collided while I bolted through halls, so many halls. Confusing doors I try to open only lead to more hallways and those hallways only lead to more doors, and those doors…

Circles, I'm traveling in infinite amounts of circles and they lead to nowhere.

Suffocating,

Heavy breathing,

Blur,

I'm afraid, I'm afraid of being caught by this person that my eyes couldn't stray off of. I'm realizing I am scared of my family, what will they do to me? Stop! They'll just put me in the Closet and all will be said and done, but the stupid feeling that is in the pit of my gut will not extinguish! I wailed like a child begging for its food, I pounded my fist on the wooden floorboards until they were numb. Footsteps came towards me, run, I have to run. My childish tears still fell to my cheeks as I ran down the hallways, being careful that I didn't go down the same one twice.

Stupid, my life is worthless without them.

Do I really believe that? Yes, wait, no, but…

I just need to be out of here, and all will be still, like it always was.

Still.

When I heard the male's footsteps come closer, I went faster, and when that happened I thought of the dream I had. Questions popped in my mind; who was the blonde girl the pink flowers in her hair? Why were there a giant lizard chasing here and when the fire erupted from its throat, why did I walk to it. I longed for the fire the wrap around my life; it was an escape, a damned one.

Even when my legs at started to harden and blister, I kept running. Steadily slowing down little by little, I give up. I stood by a door that I swear I've been to before, waiting for the footsteps to strengthen behind me. When I could feel the male's presence, I turned around to look at his face, why is it always his face? The anger that flared inside my before was snuffed out by the tears that crusted my eyes. I was tired from the running, the constant running through these halls.

I was shorter than he was; he was about a head taller than I was. His shoulders weren't broad, but I could tell they had muscle. "I'm here to help you, please trust me." His honey sweet voice bubbled inside me. Why? It's a question I think I've been annoying myself with.

One more question had to me asked. I managed to blurt. "Who are you?"

He seems not at all phased by it. "Darien." He offered his hand out to me, I flinched. "It's alright, your okay." He says that, over and over again he says that. I didn't shake his hand; all I did was consider it for a moment.

_Love…_

It burst through my mind as if it was its business. I'm not his child, obviously, I don't have blue skin.

"What's yours?" his hand lowered as he asked, his face was so caring. I-I didn't know what to do…

"Freak." I tried to square my shoulders and look strong, but it fell flat.

He laughed.

Embarrassment clouded my cheeks and made them red.

How is my name funny? It is the name I was given. Should I laugh at his name to? Darien-

"That's an awful name to give to someone so pretty." His smile, again was-

Wait.

Did he just say _pretty_?

His face fell pink, well, as pink you can get with blue skin.

"I'm sorry I," his smile faded, and muddle eyes he bore went up and down my body. "Normally I just, um, you should probably dress in something better. I don't think sheets are that good to protect you." He smiled majorly, and pointed behind him with his thumb. "I'll give you some warn clothes, and I already set up a bath for you." His face couldn't have anymore embarrassment written on it.

Should I follow him? Darien is offering help, like Hilde did. I couldn't differentiate between being utterly mad at him or thankful that he is even offering anything. My body was reacting somehow, it gave this odd feeling.

I'm being foolish again; whatever I'm feeling is…

I don't know what to think.

When I followed him to the place that seemed like a bathroom, I was amazed. I've only ever taken a bath when I came out of the Closet, and not even that had looked like this. This had a white, porcelain tub which had been filled to the top with clear as glass water. Before I had to bathe in a cauldron that was filled with dark, dirty muck, and I thought the cauldron was the best people had.

"It's not that special." I noticed that he was looking at me, and not like before, but with something else. Is he thinking I'm pretty? "This is actually quite bad compared to other places." I wanted to say that it was amazing, but I couldn't help but feel the sensation of water on my skin. The male-Darien- walked over to the tub, and placed his finger inside it. "Sorry, it's cold." He raised his finger out of the water and formed it in the shape of a cup. The sensation I felt in the dream filled my body with complete wonder, fire was forming upon his hand, and heating the water.

How is the fire forming out of his hand!? I stepped back behind me, this isn't natural.

When I grabbed behind me and found nothing, he turned his head and apparently saw the fear in my face, because his eyebrows arched, puzzled, and asked, "You've never seen someone cast a spell before?" he acted like it was the most normal thing in the world. "Cast" and "Spell", these words I've never heard before in my whole life.

Idiotically I just glared at his palm, smoke was still singing from it in glorious notes.

"How were you-"he paused, "Trust me, its fine." And not once did his voice waver, he was understanding me. How could I trust this person? He just made fire spark from his hand, but the white-hot sensation for wanting the warmth of the bath to envelope me in its tender care led me on. When I touched the water with my finger tip, it seemed like the whole world sped up.

"I'll just go; your clothes are on the counter top, in here." He scratched the back of his head and left the word without another word.

White fabric danced behind me as I entered the tub full of the most amazing feeling in the world. My mind relaxed, and groaned in the pleasure of the hotness of the liquid. I decided to _actually _clean myself after "who knows how long". A mirror was placed on the wall the tub was facing; I could see my Albinoness seeing me, considering my own well-being. Why it is that no one else looks like me? Everyone has either pale to near black skin. Even I barley ever see blue skin when I get out of the Closet?

The grogginess the overcame me told me different, I should just-

The knocking at the door woke me up from my dreamless splendor. "Hey, are you alright in there?" It was Dairen, checking up on me. I couldn't help but answer, even when part of me said not to.

"Yes." No reply.

When I got dressed in the light-green dress and the leather boots he gave me, I exited the room, not even thinking about the way I'd barley ever dressed this way before. The smell of warm stew filled my nostrils, I've only gotten small portions of this type of dish in the Closet, and that stuff was cold, this stew was bright deliciousness.

What is it with my fixation on "warm" things lately?

I followed the scent to the room where I had first woken up, he was sitting on the side of the bed, holding a wooden plated that carried a small white bowl.

"I thought you might need this." He gestured to me to sit down. I –not reluctantly- but almost wanted to sit by him, and eat the stew.

As I ate the stew, he looked at me.

It was something that everyone in the Merchant's Quarter saw me with, pity.

"Why were-"he started but I brutally interrupted him?

"I need to go home." Even with the comfort of this place, I should honestly get home. The Family is missing me.

_Are they really?_ I quickly shoved the thought in the back of my mind.

He just looked at me, marveled by the question. "Why would you want to?"

Ferocity overcame me; I've never acted out this way until recently. "Why would I want to?" I repeated him, "That is my family! The care for me and-"

"Then why did both your mother and father push you down the steps! Where I found you." His teeth clenched. This is the first time his voice grew in raw power.

What?

No, impossible. Why don't I think of it before, no, I just tripped, that's all? Then why was I afraid of them before? My, my…

"How would you know?" I managed to form the words in my clouded mind.

"Why do you think?! Because I saw you get thrown from the steps. That's the only reason why you're alive, here, did you even think on why you were in this bed!"

No…well…maybe…

Awkward silence befell us both, "Just think about it for tonight, and when you wake up in the morning, tell me what you think."

Idiot! I am _not _staying here, _not_ now. My body worked its way up, only to be grabbed by his cold hands.

And the stew he was holding to be whacked upon my face.

I yelped, not knowing why because I felt nothing. Nothing at all.

"I knew it!" he jumped up in glee, why the glee?

I just stood there in utter shock,

THIS. GUY. IS. CRAZY.

This is all I could think as he bloomed the phrase that would change the way I'd look at heat forever.

"You're a Pyromancer!"

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**Did you like that ending? I planned it to be longer but I didn't want it to drag on and on and on and on! **

**Anyone can give me constructive criticism on this little project in mine it is always welcome!**

**Like, is my girl a Mary-Sue? I'd hate if she was, so tell me if you Love or Despise her guts! **

**It may take awhile for my next update, so if your following this. Don't worry! **

**Thank you for reading.**


	3. The Word I Will Earn

**Holy Mother of that all is mighty it has been awhile! It can be put into a simple term that a lot of Fan fiction writers use, "I HAVE BEEN SO FRIGGN BUSY." **

**Don't worry yourselves, I have not given up on this story. And I do plan on writing more so don't worry your little booties. **

**:Oh and note, I do not own Elder Scrolls, well, except for my OC. She is all mine...**

**So, without anymore babbling on my behave,**

**Enjoy**** the happening of my girl. *Pats on head***

** "."**

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Chapter 3

Darien.

His words rang in my head.

_Pyromancer_

_ My family does not…_

No, they do. They do…

More droplets scarred my blotched face. The pillow cushioned the side of my cheek as I shaped my body into a fetal position; the green linen blanket covered my body. Why am I here? I don't remember getting into the bed, only the fact that my mind raced with his accusations. And, here is the real kicker.

_There is a reason why I'm albino. _

Well, of course! I was born this way because… Well… I was born this way.

Right?

_Pyromancer_

_ Dreams_

_ No lo…._

I can't just extinguish the fact that my family cared for me; they gave me a home, shelter from the unknown world that is blocked by Windhelm's walls.

_Then why did the woman Hilde help her son, help __**you**__ when your own mother never did anything of the sort. _

Because she… because they…

How am I supposed to know!? I am the child and they are the adults, I am practically a babe in terms of the shopkeeper's, barkeeper's and all sorts of soldier's ages.

_Do you even know your age?_

…no

_You're in denial_

Of course I'm in denial, how would the Hilde's child react if he was told that his parents never cared for him?

_How would you know, you only come out of the Closet once a month. You get scared around people; think they'll attack you at any moment. _

Why shouldn't I, huh? Mother and Father told me that if I touched them, besides them, they'll turn snow white, and die.

_Then why is it when he touched you, he didn't die?_

I…

Just…

Shut up! Just go away! Just go, I want to have nothing to do with you!

_Dumbass…_

The sob burst from my lips, I pounded my fists on the bed. Wanting all of it to go away.

Just to slip away.

In my own personal oblivion.

I punched until my skin felt raw, and screamed until my throat grew scratchy.

_Dreams. _

My dream reached the apex, grabbing at my thoughts as if I was in a cage. Girl who bore pink flowers, running from lizards flame. Sending her ice beings to do her bidding, and decimate it. Me, walking into the flares, embracing its eternal glory. Who was she? She didn't look like anybody I knew.

My eyes crusty, I closed the curtain. Tired of myself, of whom I am, what I was before.

_They pushed me down, flinging me into nothing. To this place. Hilde would never have done that, him, Darien would never do this to me. He could care for me, even…_

_Love._

My heart skipped a beat at the word, and toward him.

I tried to repel the thought, but I had to face myself.

_They wanted me dead, to have nothing to do with me. I…_

_Never loved me…_

_Should I hate them then? Maybe, no, they..._

_Again, they wished me gone. Go away._

The sunlight hit my eyelids, sending me into smiles. I'm still here.

And I'm glad, but another part of me still was present. Slumbering in my gut, _run._

No, I won't.

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I sat up, staring at my body. Clothed, with the same attire I wore yesterday. I placed my palm to my cheek. The stew wasn't there anymore, not even remnants of meat. The coldness straightened my spine, leaving me feeling empty. Longing for its warmth.

* * *

Over the past few days, or what I can even count as days, he Darien has treated me to vast portions of foods. From stew, ironically, to slabs of cooked cuts that frosted my taste buds for hours.

Our looks to each other have grown from slight side glances, to five second gazes.

My inner-conscious chides, _wrong_.

Somewhere though, I can feel it basking in my soul, is a word. This word has formed in my mind, in the form of tiny syllables ready to be pushed out.

_Right._

* * *

The dream hasn't come back yet, fortunately. Curiosity, of course, wishes to overcome my judgment.

In more ways than one.

* * *

His knock lightened me, I spoke, shaky still. "Come in." I swore to the part of me that was still scared of him, I needed to calm down.

"I, uh, just wanted to finally work with your Pyromancy today," I swear I could see his cheeks redden. "I know it's been awhile, but now is the best time ever for this." He revealed behind him a small, wax thing cupped in his smooth hands, with the drop of fire atop of it. "I need you to try something, if you don't mind." He smiled, I wanted to reply the same, but I my throat didn't even utter so much as a gargle.

I didn't mind, not now.

He held it closer, wanting me to inspect it, but my mind couldn't find any reason to. It was just a normal candle, with all its normal glory.

"I need you to cause growth to flame." His words killed me, they screamed in my mind DOES NOT COMPUTE.

How in the world would he expect me to do that?

He seemed to notice the confusion on my face because, "Since you specialize in fire type magic, you could go on easier igniting this then most people." I understood.

Right, I can easily make things go boom-boom, got it.

"But, in this case. Other types of magic, such as ice, and even spiritual, are harder to deal with, much more so in your case."

Ok, setbacks.

Only half- get- it but alright.

"So, what I need you to do is concentrating, and let the fire grow on this candle." His steep amber eyes looked into mine, a silent prayer invoked in me, wanting to swim in them.

I hesitated, but over shadowing it due to my trust in Darien, he wouldn't hurt me, engraving this into my brain so I cold acknowledge it.

My right hand lingered over the candle, hovering over it like….

Can't think about _them, _I just won't.

"Now, imagine the fire coming through you. Let it caress you." His voice washed me, and I fully comprehended what he spoke.

At home.

You can do this (no name/Freak), you can do this.

At home, there was a fireplace, it licked my face when Father once nearly shoved my face into it, but Mother intervened, she said that she needed to look well, in the face, to go out next month.

I needed to imagine that warmth that praised my face, and the heated bath water, and the stew that had been splashed on my face. I let the hot cuddle me, and swallow me until I focused on the one part of my body.

My hand.

The yellow-orange flare tickled my skin, setting my face alight.

"Wonderful job!" My lips cracked at his words. "This is good progress, and, ah! Here is another thing for you." He stuffed his mitts into his pockets, fumbling for something, and when he pulled the locket out, my breath shook.

It has diamond encrusted, in the shape of a heart, its golden sheen sparkled in my eyes, it was attached by silver chain, and just enough fit around my neck.

Mo-

Mother always had a jewel strapped to a string around her neck; this was one of the things I had truly admired about her. Now, I'm not sure what to think.

"Ok, now here is the tricky part." With candle in one hand, and the heart in another, he offered me to necklace. I gladly obliged. "I need you to try to conjure your own fire."

I held the wax in my palm, feeling the whine of the flare find me.

I nodded, even though I had no idea how to create my own.

"Cup your hand to the air, and just like I said. Concentrate."

I did.

But no flame was present.

"Great, nothing." My heart cried, MAKE HIM HAPPY! "You have one of those cases in which you need to have flame already around you. Interesting."

Nothing about it was interesting, I felt...

Lost, like I can help but feel disabled, challenged into what he thought was extraordinary.

"If that is the case, then this locket will be more needed to you." He held the diamond organ in front of me, and opened it my switch of a button on its side. Revealing nothing but a gold interior. "Try to move the flame, make in small, and house it within this." He gestured to the necklace with his head.

Urg.

I settled my mind on the spark, feeling its inhales and exhales, its rise and lows. Let the oxygen fill my lungs and let my inner core shine.

My hairs flattened, the orb floated between my fingers, the wisp hugged my palm. I urged the feeling of smallness, and so:

It shrunk into the size of a grain of rice, and eased into the locket.

And shut.

His hands held the locket, shaking slightly, and whispered. "This will be your source of power; the locket will help you in any time of need. But, be careful, because if you can't control it. It will wither and die out."

His blunt words sent me back into reality. His arms looped around my neck, lifting my hair to lock the chain of the charm. His eyes…

Amber glow. They looked into min, and mine his.

_You're so cheesy, _this thought had never occurred to me before. It escaped my mind as soon as I felt this beat that thumped my chest…

What could it be?

"Now, I need to try something else with you."

The winding corridors in which I had once forsaken now seem familiar now, with _him_ I felt more relaxed, like he won't want to do anything but help me, to nurture me.

We came across a damp, wooden door. His hand rolling the metal knob, he opened the door to reveal the death-like spear that made me fall to my knees.

"Whoa, Whoa, easy does it." Hands stiffened at ones touch, they were mine. _Snow, I hate it_

_Be strong_

I waved off his hands, regretting it immediately, but mustered the staggered steps that led me to look upon the rung environment. It was an exact image of what I had seen before I had fallen from the steps. And, here they were, they mocked me with their cracked ambiance.

"Do you need to come in? You look-"

I have no need of your pity, I _will_ face this.

I wrapped my arms around me, stepping onto the brick road, the flurry brushing against my body. The fluidity of my veins bashed me; I shielded my face from the heavy wind. My mind flashed blank,

The locket; I grabbed it, willing the fire to overcome me in its warmth that I all-so desired. The spark flew in front of me, soon forming a cloak of inferno, blocking my body from the blizzard.

Through the cracks of the flame, I could see his face. Widened, should I feel ashamed?

No. I feel glorious.

I want to just too…

Run, go away from this place. Travel to far off distances and see what is beyond Windhelm. A shacked torture in me hid that though, the thought of leaving here, into the unknown. It's terrifying to me.

That's when his hand penetrated my incineration spell, making it home in the locket once more, and holding me by the door. Our faces near each other, the (soon annoying) pounding of my heart returned, along with the flush on my face and madness of my now jelly-like spine.

He moved in closer in my face, considering it.

"Blaire."

"W-what?"

"Your strong, anyone else would've ran straight back into shelter. You enjoyed yourself when even I couldn't dare try. You try to stay strong in your believes." I felt like an idiot with my mouth gaped. "The name suits you well, do you not agree?"

_Name_

_May name is Freak_, _I have known this all my life. The Family calls me this, and even the people on the outside referred to me as this, and more. Is it larceny, that he should anoint me something else? _

_Blaire_

_It even sounded nice, straight to the point. But am I so shallow to even consider the reincarnation of another name? Why should I even listen to him?_

_He feeds me food, cares for me._

_Does he love me then?_

_Like Hilde and her child. No, this is something else. Not child-like love between a parent and child. It is the bondage the Mother and Father, Wife and Husband, that they show to each other._

_But not to me. _

_They never loved me._

_They hit me, threw my down stairs so I could rot in a snow encased coffin._

_All this time, they never showed me an ounce of compassion. You want to know who does, who has been doing it all this time._

His name came out clear, forward because I know it. I accept it. "Darien."

By mind went on, babbling, but I don't mind

Not now.

"I need you to know something, I-I, I just been thinking about the strangest things lately. You have been giving me everything, and well, it's about you. And this stupid pounding in my heart keeps coming back to me, and I just need to-"

His amber eyes, ever-so iridescent, my breath gave away.

_I know and I understand your problems. And I will guide you through all of them. _This is what they told me. He-

His lips connected with mine.

* * *

**Oh girl, that just happened!**

**She is soooo going to be like...**

**What, did you honestly think I was going to tell you! **

**Blaire, what do you think of the name? **

**As always, although I am confident in my story, constructive response and fair advice is always appreciated!**

**Thank you, and see you (more like write to you!) next time. ;3**

** PS. Don't worry, I know the last two chapters have been a little "drama-esc", but, stay with me, action will be picking up soon.**

***Hint-Hint***


	4. The Ones That Hurt Me

**Author's Note **

**Hello all you beautiful people of the world! Hope you had a good day or night so far. **

**Sorry about the super, major long wait for this chapter. Hope you understand.**

**But, there is honestly no ****excuse for that long period, but still. **

**Now, read on my fellow fanfiction-ers. **

* * *

Chapter 4

Electricity flourished from my lips, to the tips of my toes. The softness of his lips overwhelming me, catching me off-queue like an unsuspecting jar falling to a concrete floor. My feet stood on end while my eyes closed its net. His hand cupped my face, and the other the back of my head. Although, this warmth he loans me, despite the incredible feedback my heart radiates, feels off. Like this wasn't the right time to be doing this, or I shouldn't be even liking this.

Love. This is love? No, I can't be allowed to do this. I can. I'm not.

_ Sure, why not?_

Because it is wrong.

_How so?_

He loves me and-

_And you don't?_

This thought ricocheted within my mind, pushing through until I had to think and do that dreadful action. The one that is caused by the narrowing thoughts in my mind, the thing that keeps me from wanting him back.

Fear.

My hands flattened on his rough chest, and pushing my body backwards, the tears came to. I tried to push them back but the anger boiled me in my cauldron of a body.

Why did he do so? Our lips joined; does that not follow a binding contract to each other? That brings up another question:

Am I ready to accept that contract?

"What do you want from me?" I shook my head, not looking into those speckled eyes of his. He stepped forward to me, his face tranquil, and hugged my hands into his. Our breaths in sequence.

His.

Mine.

His.

Mine.

His voice, like sweet honey, uttered a word. This single two-syllable script could mean multiple things. 1. He won't want anything to do with me, 2. I mean squat to him, and 3. All he wants is to take care of me, help me through life on a white-horse carriage.

To love me, infinitely…

He breathed, taking in the moment. "Nothing."

More fury awakened inside my body. "Nothing _what_ Darien?" That was the first time I'd ever said his name aloud, its droplet pinged in my mental pond, ravaging ripples that waved my mind.

Those amber eyes glistened to me, scrunching up a bit in discomfort. Or is it discontent? "Nothing, what I mean is that I don't want to use you, I'm not going to hurt you in any sort of-"

"See, you keep on saying that, 'I'm not going to hurt you. Trust me.' But, what I can't shake off is, _why_? Why do comfort me! Why do you make me so frustrated and flustered at the same damn time? Why do you Love Me?"

All he did was move up to me, squeeze his arms under mine, and hold me in his smoothness, which made me want to stay there forever. To be held in his and mine, in _our_ cocoon.

Our personal oblivion.

Jailbreak, the tears sounded from my ducts, wetting his shoulders, and raining down his cotton linen. Mixed emotions of volume from scorn, all the way to the deepest tip of my heart. I struggle from his arms, yet snuggle in them at the same time. I hit him hard on the chest, wanting him to pay for what he has made me feel, yet I want to feel his lips against mine once more. I love him, yet I hate him. If this is what it's like.

Then I want it all.

I soften upon him, waiting for his next phrase that'll help me through this. Guide me, show me the way.

And so we stood there, in the snow-hatred blanket, embracing in what is exactly I had feared. The concept of love, I find, is tricky. You love _the one_ eternally, and yet you have the nagging feeling in the back of your head that whispers: _stop, this is wrong. No._ But, that isn't quite right, is it?

To whole-heartedly love another, you must unconditionally give all you have. With no sliver of doubt in our tiny minds should we consider in that _one_ other, unbalanced.

But could I? This contradicts my point. Could I ever equally put that much love to him as he has done to me?

Yes.

I know I can.

This time, I create a space between us ever so slight it is though, and this time- I showered my love, my hopes and dreams, into one simple contract that binds us together- onto his warm lips.

My name is Blaire, and I accept it.

* * *

One day, he decided to show me the "new room" as he put it, after training with my pyromancy. He led me down the familiar hallways, and opened the gateway to the showering of my imagination. This room had wooden shelves stacked along the four-square walls. Each had a vast compilation of books, all varied from leather-bound to soft cover paperback. "I just thought you'd maybe want something to pass time a little." He paused. "It's okay if you don't-"

"I love it!" I've gotten used to saying the word in many cases, from specifically him, to taking a liking to his beef stew. He picked a book off from the left hand corner shelf; it bore green patterning, with the words _The Princess and Her Mare_ glazed upon it. I twirled; taking in the beautiful craze these gave me. I wanted to read them all, to take in all the stories they withheld.

"Shall we?"

We sat on my bed; he opened the hardcover, its spine cracking like fire's sparks.

His voice.

Violet wonder.

"_Once upon a time, there was a princess of scarlet locks, in a kingdom with a name lost in time._

_It was her sixteenth birthday, her belly combusted yellow-shade butterflies at what her father, the king, might bring for her._

_To her liking, he brought her one white-ash steed on her behave. _

'_To you, I place in excellent care, a mare that will guide you on life's splendor.'_

_The girl was simply happy; no other child ever had a horse, such as fine as this one, at her age. She marveled in the elegance her present, it stood proud in the sun's ever gloom, and wanted to ride it. Like she had seen the guardsmen do so._

'_My dear, to traverse this noble steed, you must first tame its inner core, and connect the hearth of your inner soul to its own.'_

_So, the princess taught it to heel, to care for another, and love another. She wouldn't want anything more than to be with her mare. _

_Later in her years, war had erupted in the kingdom. Every able horse was required by Law to be used as an asset for wartime. Then so, the princess's mare was taken from her. Of all else, she would not stand for it. If her only friend in the princess's entire life was going to be stolen from her heart, she was going to find it. So she cut her drapes that fell to her waist, to pixie cut surrounding her head, and meandered off join this conflict."_

He waited for a beat, considering me, looking at my reaction at this story. I think she is admirable, able to give up her noble's life to find her one true friend in the world. Was it something I could have done?

He continued.  
_"The war had waged on for many a year, while the princess still looked for her horse. One day, prowling the meadows of the battlefield, after a bloody conflict that killed thousands of innocent lives, s he stumbled upon a mangled corpse. This body her friend, her partner in life, and it was now dead. Her mare is gone._

_She wept and cried until her eyes could produce no more._

_Then, in the precipice of her mind, she thought._

'_My mare, even in brindled space, has been with me ever since I was a sprout. He was then always by my side, in my heart. So, why should I weep? He will always be here, even if it is not in physical form, but in my heart. Forever and always'_

_So the princess stood proud, went to fight many battles in her life. Soon to even become queen of her land lost in time. _

_Her and her mare would reunite once more, but not for a long time. And the princess accepted that, she will live her life, not in self-pity, but to the fullest. Because that is what her mare would've wanted._

He closed the book, a tear nearly dropped upon the parchment, but he dashed it aside. "What did you think?" he gave a dry sniffle.

I thought it was moral-questioning. What I mean is that this story teaches that even when a loved one is gone from your life, he or she will always be with you spiritually, eternally. That's what I told him. He nodded in agreement, smiling at me. I leaned on him, laying my head in his chest while he tilted his head on mine.

Darien, he loves me.

I love him.

He will guide me through my life, even when he is not there. But, I will not just stand idly by when he does all the work. No, I will keep him up to. We'll keep each other up, shoulder to shoulder, in sickness and in health. This is love. I am the princess, and he is my mare. And I will hold him in my heart, forever and always.

"I want to tell you what happened." It had been a week since I have come to terms with him, started to see him in the luminous light in which I should have seen him in the first place. We hold hands for long hours, and snuggle beside one another, keeping each other's warmth, as equals.

He nodded, understanding that it has taken me time to let these words out. I told him of the beatings, the dwindling life I had before this one. I spoke of the wonders I had once knew, the hell Mother, Father, and everyone else had lain before me. I stumbled on my words, trying to make out the hardship of what I hadn't realized I'd been blasted with. I shared my deepest triumph, meeting him. But, in all reality, am I really forgetting about it all? Am I clicking them from my memory, so they can never bother me again? Or am I just suppressing them, avoiding the inevitable pain that may soon come back to haunt me; tear me into tiny pieces so that I am nothing more than a speck of dust, floating in the wind?

I am everything, nothing, and something that hasn't to do with _them_. But could I remove these scars, the mental stops that keep me from trying?

He gave me the answer.

No pause, just immediate action. "Let's get out of this place."

My eyes snapped to him, so much so they almost groaned. "Excuse-"

"No, really. Obviously this place carries too much in you, well, on me also. And, and we could go south!" he paused, raising his hand a bit to cover mine. "What do you think?"

_Wonderful. Terrible. Beautiful. Idea._

He left a door open with his last question, a way for me to avoid stress. I could see in the cling in his eyes that he would want an answer, doesn't want to wait forever.

"Wait, you said this place has carried you before?"

"Yes, I-." he turned his head to the window, snow smearing across the preface. "I was brought here, with my family. That includes my mother, father, and my older sister. We came here seeking shelter after a war ravaged my homeland, seeking hope for another tomorrow. We didn't know of the prejudice we'd face, you see, you are the race of Nord. And, naturally, like all Nords who live in Windhelm. Think everybody but a Nord should be put down. One night, when I was sleeping in my hammock, Nords came in and killed my parents. But, there was a struggle, and in that, my mother told me 'Go with your sister, run!'." His calmness of the tale seemed to tell me that he has come to terms with it, accepted that they were dead. _His mother_ wanted him to be alive, when mine, seemed to not care whatsoever.

He continued. "Funny thing is, after many years, we still came back. Well, only I did, my sister joined a band of mercenaries, saying she couldn't bare the sight of the place again. Makes sense once you think about it though because she was-."

I wrapped my arms around him, wanting to comfort him, like he has done with me, now it was my turn. The drops stained my linen this time, and cries came from his throat.

We both have suffered from this place; we can't just sit here in our anguish when there could be something more, outside. Terrifying it was though, my heart stopped at the thinking of it. But, I'll be with him. We will stride together, help each other.

So I say, "Yes." He broke our bondage, his eyes looking into mine.

"Thank you, I…"

My stomach jumped, I could just say… Those three words…

Nothing, we just place our foreheads on each other. For awhile we did that, all keeping away silence is our breaths. Then.

"You said something about a dream? I remember, you were sweating all over the place." He chuckled.

"Yes, but, it was just a crazy dream. Nothing special, just a giant lizard."

"A giant lizard?"

"Yeah."

"You could be referring to what is called a dragon." That word, _dragon_.

"What's a dragon?"

"Well, long ago, dragons ruled all kind. The ravaged the world and called it there domain. Then, the heroes of legend defeated the World-Eater Alduin, and, then rest is just fuzzy from person to person. But, in hindsight, the dragons became extinct. No one has seen one in quite awhile." It wasn't anything major, just an explanation of what was in my dream. But, it seemed too real, so vivid. Like it will happen, soon.

"So, you said your family had a _different house?_"

"Yes, it was bigger than all the rest, well…" Besides the castle that soars high into the sky, the Palace of Kings Aunt Poppil put it.

"We're going to need a swordsman… Oh! That reminds me, since I just told you about myself, no, that couldn't possibly, yes, we could. But, would she?" the gleam in his eyes bent my lips. "We are going to need money, more then we have now, and like I said, we couldn't survive out there alone." Not making sense.

"What do you mean?"

He took my hand and cupped it into his, the warmth gathering within me. "Do you want your family to pay for what they did to you?"

"With…money?"

His laugh brought red to my cheeks. "No, with _revenge_."

That word, I've heard it in slight rumor, when Father reads his books, which he reads aloud, and speaks of 'getting back at another', _revenge_.

I must've have been giving a confused look, so he laced it out for me. "Since your family has a big house, I'm guessing that they must have a lot of money, so we could steal it."

All I could say was, "You're saying that Mother And Father has this money that we could take away, and if we do so, we'll be able to be together?"

"Exactly." My smile brushed off of his, I want to be with him as much as he does with me. But, "Why couldn't we just stay here after we steal the money?"

He laughed, "My, you don't know much about the world do you?"

Anger flustered to my cheeks, what gives him the right? But, isn't he accurate? All I have ever _actually_ known is Windhelm, and what he has told me when he tutors me.

"Well, that's alright." He gave me that 'I get it, your fine' look he has been giving me lately. It reassures me, fills me with heat inside my bones. "When someone takes something, like money, from another, it is technically against the universal law of the country. So, when someone like you or me does this, we would be taken away to a place called a jail. To stay there until our debt is paid off. Let me tell you, that is bad news."

"So why are we going to do this then, if it may lead us to this 'jail'?"

"Because sometimes the law to people like me is just, guidelines that we may follow: scum like your mother and father need to be punished, put in their place. For that is where the stealing of the money comes into play."

I understood, the plan puzzled me before, but now it has pieced into the corners of me mind, the mosaic beauty of it all let my heart manifest into something bright. Something taught by him. They deserve what is coming to them.

I will be their reckoning.

* * *

When he had told we had to hire another to help us steal the bastards' money, I must admit, I was a tiny bit sketchy on the matter. Now though, she was simply the most battle resonating person I'd ever placed my eyes on.

The knock on the door was all too quiet, like he pattering of a mouse trying to earn its days worth of chow time. It was me who immediately opened the door, I wished to see this person face-to face. Her face…

Magnificent allure it was, her face was a darker shade of blue than Darien was. Marked with odd golden markings, her high cheekbones stood prominent with the ruffle of skin over her upper medium lips. A scar. Her wood brown hair stroked to one side, showing her guarded neck. She wore leather strapping's that covered the neckline, to the tips of her toes. The two black-iron swords we sheathed to her back. Her constant stance, her feet together, despite looking normal, managed to look all the more intimidating.

Her eyes, they were a tawny yellow. Although the faded texture of the inner iris stood out. The way they stared at me, so faded…

She gave only silence. Her tawny eyes scanning me, I straightened my back, wanting to look somewhat as tough as she was. Darien told me the exact phrase to say to her, although, my mouth rumbled in her presence. I had to grow up; no more girl who had fell-no-was thrown upon the steps by her parents. "For thy stygian iron show, let the shining shadow keep us from our moment's death." They saying matched her double swords, the way their blackness engulfed you. Beckoning for your blood.

"You must be my employer?" her elegant rasp sent ripples up my spine.

"Well." I stumbled over the next few words, "D-darien sent for you, I didn't, what I mean is-."

She finger glided to my face, shaking "Stop, I understand." He showed up beside me, giving me a welcoming smile. "I wish to be paid."

"Candace, you know that-."

"Told you to _never_ call me that again, that life is over with."

"Of course, you go by your 'mercenary name', and, what was that?"

"You know I'd never tell you that you imbecile." She shook her head, redness signifying her anger. "You would find me even easier then you did before."

"You have to admit, wandering the shops of the merchant quarter was quite stupid." He smirked, turning to me; he waved his hand toward her. "Blaire, meet my sister."

That's great, and-

Whoa.

Wait a minute. His sister!?

"I thought you said that she couldn't afford to see this place again?"

"I know I did, I was rather surprised to meet her as well. I was half way to going to Candle hearth hall just to get someone else, when she showed up spying on poor man Yodel."

Her face twisted, giving off a sigh, she spoke. "All I am here for is the reward money for this escort mission of yours, so let me confirm. You'll pay me after _you_ steal the money, after _I_ help?"

"Indeed."

"How boring."

"Let us just go on with the plan." I managed to mutter, the tension between these two was going to destroy everything we're planning. I was ready for this; I know I can do this.

He loosened."Right."

**The plan:**

_~They would set off in the night._

_ No sparrow would part oculus in their presence_

_ The lion's den would be sacked through larceny_

_ And the doves, ever changing fire ,would flee~_

_ Escape_

_-Magnus Von'_

I thought of the scripture I had read once, it fit the description of the situation like the last piece to a puzzle. Candace covered me with a black cloak that draped the floor wherever I went, she mentioned I was short for a Nord; honestly I didn't really care much. But it gave me a sense of stomach flutter to know I was even more different _them_. The estate lied to all the rest, it made itself look powerful, invincible. When, in reality, it was a small shell, broken my hatred that is disguised from others until you are standing within its doors, wanting nothing then to claw your way out of hell.

I was in that hell. The floor boards' creak and the candles scream doom upon us all. I was back in what was once mine, what I claimed home. What I found to be throat clenching, what makes me want to hide in the corner and cry, this is what I will steal from and what I will run from. But now, I face it, peering into the window of the first floor in t he back entrance.

I had explained to Candace and Darien that I remember the exact placement of this "vault" that they spoke of. It was in the Kitchen, below the house, where I was whipped, marred till pain seemed as nothing. When I spoke those word the Hilde, I wasn't being stupid, I was making way for my exit out of this. This oblivion had the golden tickets that will lead us to another place. Cyrodil, this is what Darien called it. He claimed that we'll find home there, even when it will be hard. We will have each other. He will be waiting at the Windhelm docks, where we will set off by a ship. Sailing on water, I thought it was only things people did in tales.

Sure, it may seem crazy, to steal a noble family's fortune with six sacks that we would carry on our backs, in the dead of night. But, this is the only way. Right?

My hands grabbed the windowsill, pushed me up, and landed flat-footed onto the cerulean style carpeting. Candace nodded forward and crouched down while I toke point, scrabbling my mind to find images of before. Vague portraits placed themselves at the apex of my mind, I pressed on.

A guard was stationed in almost every hallway, every corner. These people who carry swords and shields, I haven't seen them before in all my time in this place. One out of many things I was neglected. We had to hide in the shadows; Candace seemed to seep into them. While I being albino could make my stick out like a sore thumb, hence the reason she gave me a pitch-black cloak.

Before we left, Candace had taken me aside and said. "How did you two meet?"

I had responded. "He toke me in when…" When I said that, I didn't realize it was still hard for me to talk about it, even with Darien, less with someone else. But I blurted, "My parents threw me off the stone steps that led here, they were abusive my whole life. I just didn't realize until…" I told myself _you can do it_, "I realized they were evil, until he helped me." She walked nearer to me.

"Do you really believe they're evil?"

Yes, of course.

_But your mother gave birth to you, I mean, really, they're your family, you can't possibly __**hate**__ them. _

My breath had stopped short; I turned away from her, not wanting to talk about it. Through such a childish move, part of me wanted them to be good. Maybe they aren't…

But, whose parents that had thrown them off stairs ever was able to claim they were "good people." She seemed so distant; she had lost her family when she was young. Saw them die, maybe this was pulling her heartstrings, if so, she didn't show it.

The house was surprisingly quite, a ghost from the screams that once filled it. The way the dark danced in the candle-light seemed, beautiful. I pushed the thought aside, nothing about this is beautiful. The hallow shell had the pretty, it had the glamour, but it was a bloody massacre of beatings. We approached a door, this door I recognized let down to the Kitchen. We made our way down the winding staircase of stone, the memories of the throat rasping, gut retching statement that was placed here filled me up. Drops of sweat dropped from my forehead. _Calm down. _My heart beat faster, my legs shook side to side, and my mind raced. We can get this done. Mother, Father, Uncle, Aunt, they are all in this place. But they can't touch me; I'm away from their grasp.

Candace took at metal tweeds, wadding over to a keyhole and placed them inside of it, wiggling them around for some strange reason. She craned her head, whispering. "I have to open this; I need you to scan the area in case some guard decides to waltz in here." I rested my back on the wall by the spiral staircase, keeping an ear out to hear something.

Nothing.

_Jab, jab_.

None.

_Jabbidy, jab._

Nope.

_Clank._

No-

_Clank, clank, clank._

"Guard!" She stopped, holding as still as a statue. I, on the other hand, was hugging the wall with dear life. The clanks echoed, growing larger. Faster paced, my hearty skipped a beat, and then gone. The clanks vanished, and Candace went back to working. But, something about those clanks was off. They weren't like steps; they were abnormal flaps, like me banging on the wooden floor.

The voice spoke. "Mr. Shield! You have a knack for running away from me!" The crook of my lips sent me on a mental self-discipline. We both sat still, but when a plate-size wooden device bounced on the floor, my spine bent backwards, and my ribs tracked out from the black cloak. Candace just sat there; contemplating it like it was tomorrow or die.

_Clank…clank, clank…CLANK!_

Each time the stairs gave way to the boom of the tumble, my heart paused, my mind winced, and my legs turned to jam. But my eyes were still aimed at the shield, why did it decide to fall down_ here_ of all places? Now, I'm pretty sure a shield doesn't have feelings.

_BOOM!_

Metal scrapped the floor, letting stabs into my eardrums. The guard let out grumbled sigh, waggling about on the stone floor. "Mr. Shield, I may have killed myself. Goodie, goodie, now I can sleep in hell!" He snorted, saliva seeped from his thin lips. Drunk, only once have I encountered this behavior, this was when Uncle gave his worse beatings. Candace stepped toward him; I tried to raise my hand up, anything to stop-

The knife stood amongst the blood, the forehead sinking, and the smell crept up my lips. She killed this man, in cold blood. She just waltz up to him an ended his life. She was no better than my parents. _But, isn't that what we're basically doing here, stealing their fortune. Taking all they worked for, their lives? _ Yes. That is exactly what we're doing here. I need to accept the fact that to gain a life, sometimes means to take one.

Do I really believe that?

The click of the vault announced triumph, and the door opened to the tickets to our new life. All the gold coins were stacked in even shelves, each giving me swirls within my stomach, and the angelic sheen glossed to the outer walls, brining me into its fiery touch. Candace stood by the open door, packed her tweeds, and took out six individual sacks. She handed three to me, and started to pig out. I shook my head, and went along to do the same.

My heart skipped a beat each time my hands came in contact with the soft, creased tickets. Darien and I would be free of this place, we would go to Cyrodil, and live our lives to the fullest. No Mother, no Father to teach me the false things about the world I have never known. Nothing to stand in our way to our upmost freedom, never will I be alone again, starving in the Closet.

Forever and always.

"So Freak, you came to be free, to feel the warmth?"

Mother.

I head snapped, her false elegance swayed from side to side. Her pencil eyebrows curved downward, lashing at me, taking me into her fine placed hands. They made me feel fragile, insignificant to all surroundings. Her eyes wished to make me curl, cry until the pain numbs, and let out the screams that were never heard.

Candace unsheathed her dual sabers, readying herself for unsurpassed conflict.

"So, you actually expected to get your white ass fingers on my jewels. Let you prance around with the Dark Elf shit you call your 'lover'." How does she know-?

Candace stepped forward, holding an arm toward me off "Stand back, let me deal with-."

"Ah, it seems you brought another mistress to do your bidding." She smacked her lips, holding out a beckoning finger toward Candace. "Tell me blue skin, has this _thing_ manipulated you? Has she filled you with false lies about how 'abused' she is by everyone?" she looked toward the dead guard. "She even got you to kill a guard, how nice; he was a regular dunk anyway. So, no loss there."

My fists were clenched, and my nails digging into my palms. Candace was still, pointing one sword to Mother, and another to the ground, prepared for an upward slice.

"You know he's lying to you, right?" My eyes bulged, my tongue biting back, "he says he loves you, but you never know, a thief always remains a thief. Isn't that what you're doing here, to thieve from us?" I went forward, but Candace's arm bumped my stomach, blocking my path. The logic she puts out, what she's saying. The old me would think of this truth, that she has always cared for me. Now, these are all lies she spews. Everything in her is charcoal, nothingness that has never once been looked after by another human being.

"Don't you get it? He _does not_ love you."

I let my tongue roll out, saying the word that I have only heard once. Insignificant as it may seem to an outside audience, I even surprised myself saying it. "Bitch."

"Ah! She finally says something; I thought you've lost your voice."

I rushed against Candace's arm, it flexing. "Stand back."

Her jaw tightened. "Blaire, you know the orders-."

"He even gave you a name. This gets even more cliché the more I learn about it!" She smirked, cackles erupting from her throat.

We both looked at each other, Candace darting her head back and forth from Mother, and to me. But, her eyes, the yellow fade glistened across her pupil. The way they stared at me, so faded… She nodded, dropping her arm to let me pass, she stood back to the vault.

"You stand up to me Freak? I am your own mother, who raised you from birth. Even loved you!"

I held the locket, letting the warmth consume me. _Shower me in the silver lining you withhold._ "You never loved me." Metal gleam was the daggers Mother pulled from her dress, she leaped. It was split second decision, one that could provide an escape that could hurt her. Did I care, maybe? The sparks streaked across the room, flying around me, my arms guiding the flow, dancing my personal tune the cried pain. Targeting its destination, I fired.

The flame crushed Mother's right arm. Her throat shattered, rippling to anyone who might possibly be capable of hearing this. Cold hands wrapped around my arms. But Candace was still by the vault, and Mother was kneeling down in agony. Father's fist connected with my face.

Blood blossomed onto my face, my hand slapped onto my cheek. The numbness that used to protect me from the pain long ago was gone; no I feel the caressing ache crossing my mind, telling me to defend myself. _Spread the flame to him. _

"You dare come back! After we finally got rid of you, now you harm my wife. You deserve what you got; for all that you've done to us."

My brows furrowed. "No, you do." My arms flung sideways, the pyre slamming into Father. His arms extended, the fire stopped at his palms. It shredded outwards, ricocheting the flow back at me.

"You used it." Mother's scratchy voice froze my spine, she stumbled, and her feet stomped one by one. "You used the curse Nords disgrace."

Father's eyes popped his back slouching. "Darling I just had to, she was-."

Her face, tomato red, everything was angled. This messed with her pretty looks; her blonde hair fell onto her face with shags, her teeth bare as she snarled. "Come here." He growled between grated teeth, Father, not giving an ounce of knowing I was their anymore, swayed to her side.

Candace was at my side immediately after, whispering. "Let's go." Before I could oblige, Mother nabbed Father by the neck and is body waved the dust that lied on the ground. His hands sprawled in front of him, the dagger placed upon each.

"You shall pay the price my husband." The sliver of blood rolled to the stone etched floor. "I love you." The blood spurt to the air, his veins popped, and the tears spread to his cheeks. The first time I'd ever seen Father cry.

Candace tugged on my arm, I allowed her to take me, the nauseating feeling in my gullet was starting smother my torso. We pushed through the screams, and made it to the outside hallway. Where guards were piling, wishing to know why the cries in the night were happening. "Intruder!" her swipes her blind to the naked eye, one by one red sprouted from each guard, falling to ground to choke on the death they've come to.

The stone floor echoed behind us as we found our way outside, the bags of coin crushing my shoulders, the guards stomping their chainmail, and snow falls to my face like broken glass. Darien would be waiting by the docks, ready for us to make our way to freedom. Candace, with each step, slinked a crystalline needle, and fling it back. With each guard, another slumped onto the ground, blood seeping from their moon gleamed amour.

The docks were aligned in jumbled symmetry, so Darien had a perfect hiding spot for the boat. There he was, his midnight hair, showered in lunar gloom, turned as his head did, and that face bent into a smile. He waved at us, urging us to come quickly. But our faces announced "danger behind". His smile soon dropped as we crowded by one another. Candace's sword outstretched toward the enemy guardsmen, my flame cupped by my hands to protect it from the oncoming snowstorm, and Darien looking onward to the boats.

"YOU IDIOTS! KILL THEM, MAKE SURE THEIR BLOOD ROTS!" her, those arms whipping at the men and women, the eyes brining the showering madness that has consumed her. Mother batted at them, pointing at us with her shaking fingers. "KILL THE WHITE WHORE!" the guards seemed to stand still, stiffened by her wailing, the puzzle they are trying to solve. "THEY TRIED TO STEAL FROM ME, ARE YOU THAT DAFT!" But something was that matter, they were exactly still, no blinks or twitches.

They all dropped their swords and shield clanged to the snow of the ground below, and the metal plates shifting in place. Darien had his arms bare, his veins purple. "Your mother, she... she-."

"You didn't tell me you could control people's brains Darien." Candace smirked, giving off a sarcastic tone.

"Well, you know, when do I have time to say 'Hey! I can manipulate people's minds. Woo Woo!'"

He just killed them, he just-

The dagger shined the light to my eyes, causing me to block to attack with my arms. My body back groaned once the ground met it. The flame blanked out. Mother withering in my face, droplets of spit splattered onto my cheek, she wailed. "You bitch! You ruined everything I own, you destroyed my love, my life. Everything!" She was pulled from my body, Candace and Darien struggling to keep her secure.

Darien, avoiding Mother's bites and scratches, sighed. "Your mother, I couldn't control her blood."

"Why do you think? Us Nords have come to _learn_ how to avoid such magic. Why don't you try it on your new plaything? I'm sure it would be kinky enou-!"

"Shut up!" My body was soaked in sweat despite the chilling temperature, and my feet were shaky. The fact she was pinned down, her body gnarled and bruised, hair matted to her face with ugly intent, the burned smell from her arm , and these gave me a certain fixation in my stomach. It made me sick, that I'd gain any satisfaction from this. But the feeling of relief showered me, begged me to just do one measly task, to bring her dagger, and let it slide across her neck. I wanted her to feel how I felt, to be numb in her own unknown sanctity, to never to have had love.

No, I will not be like her, not willingly.

"Tell me."

"Tell you what?"

"Why, why you kept me in the dark for all those years. Abused me again and again, till I felt nothing but the dry tears that never came out." She looked at m e, her eyes lessening from the wildness of her very nature. "And don't give me some dumb excuse like, 'We hated you when you were born, so we just abused you for the rest of her life.'"

"You want closure, huh? Let me up."

"Not till you tell me." I crossed my arms, ready for any potential attacks.

"I'm sorry dear, but what you want me to show is going require both hands." I nodded to them, and they let her slip from her grasp. I grabbed the locket, as if it would protect me. Be my angel. She scrambled, tucking her dress, holding it to dear life. She laughed in hysterics, "You _really _want to know why your skin looks like bird shit?" I blinked, not giving her any answer. "This is what you did to me!"

She ripped flipped her dress, tearing her panties away till her lion were bare to the cold wind, but no shiver came to her body. Only charred nothingness was present, where a vagina should have been present, was pure white ash that seared her skin long ago remained. "For eighteen years, ever since you were born, my husband has rejected intercourse with me. All because of _you, _ I can no longer have children." My hands covered my mouth, Candace and Darien stood in shock of what was being shown before them. "The reason you have that skin, the reason you came over power the warmth, is because this _curse_ everyone else accepts called magic exists. And you know the kicker? I am the only person this has happened to!"

My light-shaded eyes merely stared at what I'd caused, I brought pain to her for existing. "But that excuses nothing that you've done! You could have still loved me, treated me as your daughter, for who I am!" My throat yelled truth to her, her body wagged, shaking in disagreement.

She said two words.

"I know."

My breath gave way, the phrase not sinking into my brain. "What?"

"You heard what I said, _I know _I hurt you. Do you honestly think I was inhuman all my life? They came here, told me that if your emotions ran rapid, you would go out of control!"

"Who is 'they'?"

"They came here after you scarred me, told me you were dangerous. You needed to be numbed of all emotion., no ties to your inner self till the time had come."

"For what to come!"

"The return of The World-Eater."

Darien and I both gave side glances to each other. He added. "What does Alduin have to do with any of this?"

She looked at him, her voice was dry moans. "Do not say his name, they can here you , from the castle on the mountain."

Candace snagged Mother's collar, pulling her upright."Enough of the pronoun game, tell us who is 'they'!"

"The Gr-." Her voice stalled, her head leaned upward, looking into the vast starlight.

_You have disobeyed us, dear mother. _ The boom imploded around my body, sending spikes up my spine.

"I had to, they were going to harm me if I didn't!"

_No excuses_.

He body shifted, her bones quaking on by one. Her mouth gaped, her eyes turned to red shimmer as the blood dripped from her eyes. "No! You can't do this to me!" her screams lead her to her knees, her hands over her head, and the result of her smashing her forehead against the stone brick floor. The pool spreading under her cracked skull, she lied there, now free of her former agony. We could've been standing here for one second, one minute, maybe one hour. I soon lost track, until the ringing of the bells brought an army of guards to our presence.

Are bodies all reacted at once, we all moved at even pace. Darien pointed over to the boat he'd acquired. It floated on the water, only slightly moving in the breeze. The landing pad was five feet in front of us, the boat closed to us as we all jumped.

The bags of gold soon felt no weight on my shoulders as we landed onto the wooden paradise. I wanted to kiss it, anything to make sure that is was truly here, under my feet. My cries must've been heard all around, because Darien joined in, dancing with me in majestic twirls, spins, and jumps.

She is dead, Mother is dead. The blanketed flare in the back of my mind wanted to be happy I'm out, free from the family's clutches. But at what cost? She was dead, Mother was dead. I should be happy, overjoyed that she is dead.

Gone from my life.

* * *

"I gain half of the gold earned." Darien handed Candace three sacks, she swung them behind her back, letting them sag on her back.

"I guess it was nice working with you sister." We were in the boat's master bedroom , saying goodbyes and parting ways.

The way they stared at me, so faded… She stammered , fidgeted with her fingers, somehow confused by the words he just said. "Uh," she paused. "Yeah, sure." She turned on her heel, and went out the door, never to be seen again. Darien shut the door behind her, not turning his head toward me, he let out a smirk. "She's a good sister, whether she knows it or not." He laid his hand on the door, flattening his palm. "Did your Mother ever teach you that Nordic way of preventing magic?"

This shortened my breath, "No, why?"

"Oh, just because I'm about to kill you. "

My body stiffened, my blood stopped in its tracks. My mind tunneled on his words. What, what did he just say?

"So predictable, Blaire, so predictable to fall in love with the first guy you actually talked a full conversation with." What? "I even gave you a name, and you accepted me." He snapped his fingers. "Just like that!" I'm dreaming, yes, I'm just dreaming. "The fact I kissed you, then you kissed me back! That was the most laughable thing about this whole act of mine. I even thought I was doing a bad job, as some people might know I'm terrible actor. "

No.

No.

No.

This isn't happening . I tried to move, but my body was thick as mud , my mind said _stay_ but I screamed "No!"

"Shut up." My mouth closed, wanting to do whatever he ordered for me to do. "In denial yet? Don't believe that the one you so very loved is really a psychotic killer who is going to rip every limb off your body?" Now, in his hand was a golden parry knife, which slipped from his hand and into my abdomen. No blood came through, just a slit of what was once there. "I can control every cell of your body, every ounce of blood, every thought that crosses your mind."

Sex, violence, love, death, organs, and food. These things shadowed me, made my cheeks red, and at the same time wanted me to into my own personal obliv-

No, will not think those…

More slits carved into my body. Stab, stab, stab, stabbing with no pain.

"Now, when I unlock you from my grasp." Stab. "You are going to bleed out, drown in your own insides, I laugh manically like all evil people do, and steal all the earnings you so easily got for me. Oh, so sad that Candace girl had to take three sacks full of them. Wait… didn't she just leave… oops."

The door flew open, Candace's sabers aimed at the air, at Darien. Not happening, not real. Air left her throat with an abrupt motion, her eyes. They weren't faded anymore, they were a pure gold, stern in their own right. "You, you stole my name! Called me your sister!"

"Well, duh, that was the plan smart one. But you stupid assassins always have a way of remembering things, I should work on that." His mouth bent, and gave my body another mark.

She flew toward him, her sabers embers in a song of fire. He twirled around her, swift strikes rendering her stiff, stumbling to the ground in harmony.

"I, I can't move."

"You don't say, and do shut up." He scoffed, smacking his lips. "Why is it always the mouth I can't control?" he leaned his face to Candace's, chiding. "Now, see how my plaything dies a most painful death, if I do say so myself." He clapped his hands, and the nothingness enveloped me, drowning in the sweet bones if its blooming silence.

Haze, glimpses of the world around me comes to mind. Darien standing there. No, this isn't happening. He loves me, and I love him. But is killing me, torturing me as all my insides fall out of me. Inside me…_ do not worry, I will destroy… rip every cell he calls his own. Let the flame consume, I'll shower you in your eternal embrace. _

_I will be his reckoning. _

He paced around the room mouthing off the girl tied up in the corner, _ the girl with the faulty name. _"What should do with you, huh? Maybe I'll do the same thing I did to bird shit over there. No, that isn't creative though. "

Haze.

"I have to say, I'm rather proud of myself for even convincing her I loved her, I thought I was doing a half-ass job at it."

He.

He.

Does-

Not love me, he used me, but…

"I-.. I-."

"Ah, come back to say some last words to the harbinger of your demise?" That entire cam out was a scratched groan. He sighed, "Chop, chop, I don't have all day. And _you_ barley have a minute of life left Blaire."

"I-"

"Yes?"

"I-"

"Come on, say it.

_Gravel tone burst from this one, and I spoke. " I will tear every fiber of your being. "_

_The killer shrugged. _"Oh well, not what I was expecting, but, wait, did you just-."

_This one's body showered itself in flame, wings extending from its back, crackles of heat popped inside the boat. This one and I, we are not one. Her emotions run ramped, I am the power she holds inside. Until she absorbs the soul of a dova, she will never come close to any step of mastery. This one will kill the one she once deemed worth of her affection. _

_This one grappled the killer's neck, sent him against the room's wall. Then she raised him speaking through my voice. "You lied to me, you let me fall in love with every intention to disown me the moment you got your prize." She brought fire to sear his skin, his screams satisfying her. She relished in her revenge. "I will implode every cell, for every emotion you have left in that sad little body of yours you will endure the pain of all you have taken, stolen lives of." His face contorted, shaping with wrinkles and folds. _

_This one turned to the girl with faulty namesake. "Go, do with what you wish the life you have gained back." The girl sprang up, free of her bondage, and ran out. The look of horror still upon her face. This one rose up, her wings setting gall around her ablaze. He bent, his spine now rising from his torso, declaring certain death. Every part of him erupted, the fire spreading slowly yet surely. Nothing was equivalent to this pain, the feeling of rotting, like a thousand knives being pushed into you one by one. _

_All the emotions bubbled inside her, butterflies waiting to be set free. She rolled into herself, in a fetal position, her tears morphed to flowers of the pyre. Bombs brought the apocalypse to this poor boat, until: she to, exploded._

_In her own personal heaven._

* * *

_I am eighteen years of age. _

My eyes fluttered, waking to the warm, soft bristles of the white fur soothed my insides, letting me he's here, maybe that was all a dream. I jammed myself up, but a hand stopped me. I soon noticed I was lying on a hard wood cart. It was Candace's- or whatever her name is- hand. Her face was covered in snow, my head soon retracted, not wanting the evil thing flakes to touch the memories of destruction and death let all the droplets shoot out. He did this, he stabbed me. Used me for a simple endgame.

"You have to stay calm, alright?" she laid a sack beside me, the jingle of the gold muffled. "I paid off the carriage driver to take you away, but this was all I had left."

My voice rubbed against my throat like sandpaper. "Where?"

"To Cyrodil." Bile formed in the back of my mouth.

"No."

"You have to, we'll be wanted by the Windhelm guard, and possibly the Stormcloaks." I didn't know who that is, but my mind was too tired, too lazy to care at that moment.

"Why not I just go with you?"

"You're too much baggage, and I prefer to work alone. You are just lucky I gave up my earnings s for you, don't ask anything else. That can form into a bad habit." For a second her eyelids drooped, the way the woman Hilde looked at her son. Love… does sit exist? "Goodbye."

I don't know why, but my mouth went ahead of my mind "Wait."

"What?"

"What is your real name?"

She paused. Turning her head to look afar. The city sat there, unknown to what events have just occurred. Her hair was now tucked into a bun, yet strands of hair still waved in the wind.

She let out a puff of air, saying. "Jenassa."

I smiled, we never may see each other again, but at least I'll know her true name. It was a simple thing, yet it gave me a fleeting release. Like all my angst would soon fade away, but even I know that won't happen for awhile. She stepped away into the snow storm, her frame vanishing away, until she was gone.

"Should we go now?" the driver asked.

I cleared my throat, responding. "Yes." This was my escape, the beckon of hope I wanted. Am I selfish? All because I messed up, slipped on my words to Hilde.

This all started with a mother loving her child.

* * *

**Author's**** Note**

**Holy Honey buns, what a long chapter! **

**Now, yes , we are near end of her story. **

**The epilogue will be next.**

**Yes, this was my plan the whole time. **

**Good news, the next chapter will either be published today or tomorrow (in the time I published this chapter).  
**

**So, hope you have a good day! **

**Feel free to give any advice, as always. **


	5. Epilogue

**Author's**** Note**

**Good morning or afternoon all you wonderful people!**

**This is the end, I think I might cry!**

**This chapter came out quick didn't it, I was like wildfire writing this. So much tapping!**

**Thank you to all who are reading this. You are much appreciated.**

**So, read on my fellow fanfiction-ers. **

* * *

Epilogue

_The rickety-old shack was always there. Always with silent intent. There was a boy who lived in that shack, forever smiling. Nothing bothered him, expect when his victims were alive after one hour. Intestines were scattered over the floor, where he placed organs in his mouth, the blood always smearing on his face. His victims were always the same, broken, withered people who had nowhere else to go. _

_A girl was his next victim; she was an orphan girl on the streets who carried flowers to her fellow citizenry, wishing for a home. He let her in his rickety-old shack, promising her to feed her delicacies a plenty. When he came back he placed a knife in her gullet, licking the blood the poured out. He did this, again and again. Until all that was left were two brown eyeballs. He looked up, swearing he could hear a sound from afar, his crooked mouth ablaze. _

_You are that sound._

_And you are next. _

I awoke with my palms glazed in sweat, out of breath, and to the whines of the carriage horse and sounds of steel scraping against leather close to me. But the cart shook; I grabbed the blanket to cover myself up. No one must see me, the driver told me to do this because we would be crossing the border illegally. My reaction: 'More illegal things, how grand!' Sweat was starting to latch to my skin as the voices rang of in the muffled closeness, "I will have none of your like. You will not be traveling in my carriage. Unless you might have the pay?"

A high- pitched voice gave off an offended tone, "How dare you, do you know who you are speaking to?"

"Yes, yes, Ulfric Stormcloak. Your leader is the rebellion that is destroying all of Skyrim. And, quite frankly, I'll have none of that." Wait, the Stormcloaks?

Sighs and utter chatter cascaded, leaving a deep, monotone voice to break the loudness of it all. "Quiet, the Imperials might be on us at any moment, we either take the carriage out of here or we continue on foot." More unreasonable chatter.

Many voices shot out at once. "But you have room back there!" and "We have been walking for hours, we need the rest."

"Men, after them! Capture all who do not try to strike!" Padding of multiple hooves erupted; the sound of dozens of men shouting caressed the silence the supposed Stormcloaks. The screams ran afar, more steel being unsheathed sounded as the carriage horse wailed. The carriage started to hall, the rocky road bumping me up and down, that is when the carriage fell over in a waterfall of hellish snow and supplies of food gone bad.

The white fur blanket only now covered the bottom half of my body. I scrambled around, looking for the sack of gold. Nowhere to be found, just the legs of leather-bound soldiers, kicking snow and flailing the ground to be tied up and gagged.

There it was, buried by slush, awaiting me to wrap my white-ash palms around it. But, one problem, it was sitting the middle of war zone. I pulled the cloak over my head, and bolted. My heart beating against my rib cage, I avoided the steel plated men on horses, lashes of wick smacking against the Stormcloak soldiers. My vision tunneled towards it, nothing was more important than reaching for-

Gold jingled against my chest as I ran forward, no other direction but straight on, into the blazing snow. Still hate snow, have to admit though, it was a good shield to the wandering eye.

The trees were a blur, the cries tat singled pain seemed distant, and my staggered panting was a cold knife against my throat. And I was done with knives. A horse's sheer force pounded behind me.

My instincts toke over; I hopped over logs and avoided the naked branches of gnarled trees. The horseman yelled after me, warning my to surrender or be harmed.

I will not be hurt again.

Its flare spoke to me, begged me to release its power onto it. I can't… I won't do that after what happened. But this is survival, and I will not be attained. Not without a fight. I found my hand to be placed on the locket, this led me to my pain, and the one who I thought loved me was a no doubt a monster. But the ache in the back curtain of my heart wishes to believe he is still here, still _the one_ who had saved me.

But he isn't.

He broke the contract, dismembered our love and fell into a pit of greed.

_Was there ever a contract? _

I spun, twirling in the air as the ribbons lavished itself to the horseman's shield, the flares streaking to his face. The horse jumped, the horseman falling back for his spine to meet a tree. The stallion pranced off, scared of the sparks that flew around it. More soldiers came, holding their swords to the sky in agitation while I just kept sprinting forward.

_Whistle. _Pain sprouted at my shoulder, my cry making me stumble and drop the bag, coins spilling it. I turned; the men and women crowd me in a tight corner, raising their shields. "Stand down or you will be executed immediately."

The pain spread to my skull, blackening my vision.

Slowly they stepped closer, expecting my final move at any movement; nine of them were lined up, three carrying bows with nicked arrows. On sudden impulse, I snapped my fingers. The fire flew from my breast to the canopy above, letting a branch to slam down, fire spreading the heat inside me. I turned on my heel, and ran, grabbing the sack of gold to hug against my chest.

My shoulder embraced my in a howling pain, but I pressed on repeating _have to run_ in my head. The snow streaked across my face to contradict the new-found wildfire in the trees, tiny to huge branches falling around me. Smoke clouded around me, but the smell of burnt nature seemed to fill me, renew me how the warmth does. Don't people just die from this? I breathed it in, even giving off a laughing shriek, wanting to spin around and fall into the fire.

I've gone nuts.

This is my escape, my release from reality in which I would could to sleep in forever. No monsters, no parents, no freaky dreams, no soldiers.

No pain.

The shield banged against my face, plunging me into darkness, my personal future. Forever and always.

**This is the background of the Nordic Pariah.**

* * *

**Author's**** Note**

**Some of you might be wondering. WTF is with that ending?**

**Or, WTF, OMG is it just with the "BACKGROUND" thing?**

**Well, let me tell you.**

**This, to be honest was just the background story of my Skyrim Character. I was all "Holy Jeebus, she should totes have a background made for her, cause I love her!"**

**Although, this has probably been done before, I'm just explaining to you people out there. I don't know whether or not I'll continue her story, maybe I will? Not for sure. If I did, I would have to construct a enormous outline for that.**

**But, I'll still make short stories along with other big stories like this one.**

**So, have a good day or night people of the world. **

**And read on. :3**

**Again****, thank you for reading. **

** P.S. I do have a pretty wicked idea I've been thinking about though,so, stay tuned!**


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